PORTRAIT OF A YOUNG MAN, WITH VAMPIRE

by Carl Steiger

Anton Maier told me he was not a vampire, but he went out of his way to look like one. His gaunt, deeply wrinkled face was disturbing to begin with. He wore bespoke black pinstriped suits a hundred years out of style. His shirts had high, starched collars held on by brass studs. When he stepped out (and he did, often in full sunshine), he wore a dark gray bowler and dark gray spats on his black patent leather shoes. The only color he ever wore was a red silk tie and a gold watch chain.

He hired me off the street as his personal assistant (his butler, he called me). He said he admired my Goth look and that he thought I had potential. I lived in his house (a Victorian mansion, furnished with fabulous antiques and much in need of repair), and I had lots of spending money.

But I didn't have lots of time to spend any of it. Anton kept me busy running errands. I was constantly taking his suits and shirts to the cleaners.

I did his grocery shopping. He didn't drink blood, but he did eat a lot of red meat. Braunschweiger sandwiches (on rye, with cheese and slices of dill pickle) were a favorite.

He insisted that I study German and master the fraktur cursive script. German is the noblest language, he told me.

Anton loved vampires. He corresponded, on paper, with vampire enthusiasts from around the world. Letters arrived daily, mainly from Europe, but Asia and South America were represented too.

One evening in his library he offered to show me what a vampire looks like. He pulled an old leather-bound book off its shelf, flipped through the pages and pulled out a large, colorful piece of paper. He handed it to me and I saw that it was a German banknote for 10,000 marks. It was dated 1922.

"Is this my bonus?" I asked.

He didn't laugh. He never laughed. "Look at the portrait. Look carefully," he said. "What do you see?"

"I see a guy wearing a hat."

"Albrecht Durer painted that. It's called ‘Portrait of a Young Man,' but there's a vampire in the picture as well. It's hidden in plain sight; it's obvious once you've seen it."

"No, I don't see it."

"Really. I had thought your imagination would be morbid enough. Keep it. I have many more. I think you'll come to see it later."

"You're not going to point it out to me?"

"No. Find it for yourself."

I decided not to crack a joke about needing to drink a lot of beer to see a German vampire.

***